My Heart’ s Intention


My intentions for the day were to clean. Spring clean, because Phoenix is back to being Phoenix: sunny, delightful, on the bringe of being an inferno! Just a few days of grey, and I wonder how I did thirty years in Cleveland? Yesterday I went to my Yoga School. I didn’t want to. I wanted to go home and crawl into bed—sleep. But Hansel said “no”—Hansel pointed out that it would be good for me—Hansel practically pushed me out the door. Thank God for soul-mates I guess. I made it to class, rolled out my mat, when the teacher closed the studio door and in a voice of great exhaustion said: “My energy, if you haven’t noticed, is on low. Grab yourself some blankets, we’re going to focus on restorative poses.” How perfect! I realized at that moment that the greyness is more than a color, but instead it’s a density of the atmosphere. I wasn’t the only one feeling depleted. Nobody complained, we laid for what seemed hours with our legs up the wall, and I fell into a dream like state. How I love that pose, I do it often before going to bed.

So yesterday, in some ways, but I hate to say it, was a great waste. I didn’t do much. Walked Nyla, went to yoga, made fresh juice, and a pasta I was very disappointed with. You see, I’m a planner, a goal setter, a list maker, a visionary who visions what her day should be like. When will I get it through my head that it never happens that way. And everything is ok.

So my intentions to clean happened for awhile. Hansel was looking for the tool box to work on his bike, when I noticed how disgusting the space underneath the sink was starting to get. Between spilled cleaning products, the kitty-litter scooper, and the garbage, this would be my time to make it shine. So I cleaned, I guess. I organized and made that little space respectful. I also made super-duper delicious granola bars…that I’ll post on Crazy In the Kitchen this week! I also need to mention that I walked Nyla for an hour this morning, followed by a going to Yoga. So it’s all good, even if my bathroom is still a science project.

I spent the chunk of my day cruising through the amazing blogs that are out there. Every day I search the same ones–most of the ones listed on the right-hand side. But it is so much fun when you go to those blogs and read the comments and click on those folks, then at their blogs click on other blogs that they read. The web gets larger and stronger, and time falls into tiny particles of dust. What seems like fifteen minutes, was actually three and a half hours. But I feel like I made friends, or at least had a tiny conversation. Aaagh, kind of sad and isolating when you think that this is what has come of friendship in a sense.

But SuziBlu, who I adore, was on Art Talk Radio, and I decided to listen to her interview while I pulled out the new painting I started a few days ago. She’s great. She’s inspiring, and it proved to me, that many times, your art can pull you away from a “normal” life. Well, what looks normal to those that live the conventional life minus any creative endeavors. Who would want that? Not me.

So I sat on the floor and listened and just painted, for no reason at all, except that is what my heart’s intention was for the day. My mind just got the memo a little later!

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