Published on February 5, 2010
For years I’ve had basically the same habit. On my way to work I would pick up a delicious, yummy, out-of-this-world chai tea latte from this great coffee shop. Sometimes I would get a green tea instead, but mostly staying loyal to the sugary goodness of the chai tea latte.
A couple hours later, at work, it would be lunch time–and after a nutritious home made lunch, I would grab a candy/cookie/cake something that I kept stashed in my desk…or that is hanging out in the teacher’s lounge, or brought to me by a doting student or generous colleague.
Then, a couple hours later I would always start to feel down, frustrated, stressed-out and have an unbelievable craving for something sweet again. Nine out of ten times, I indulge my craving.
Finally, Connie is making her way home…but not with out a stop at the grocery store of course. Of course I need to get something…anything…and possibly some chocolate covered almonds or chocolate covered cherries. There’s my final fix, to end the day.
But here’s the thing I started to notice and really started to wonder about. For as long as I’ve had this habit…I’ve also had this horribly, sad, yucky feeling first thing in the morning when I wake up. A feeling of being depressed. I carry this feeling with me as I do my morning Yoga, take a shower, walk Nyla, and have breakfast. My morning depression would follow me in the car and turn the key for me. My morning depression every morning asked me–Connie, should you go to school today? Why not stay home–take a sick day?
Every single morning.
I finally–recently, decided that something’s not right. Because…if I was depressed–wouldn’t that yucky feeling of being depressed stay with me all day? Once I’m at school, even though I might be crumbling under a stress bomb, I still didn’t have that doomsday feeling like I would in the morning. But…but….BUT…during the middle to late in the day, it would come again. Then disappear when I was on my way home.
I thought about this. Like seriously thought about it. And I came to a real hard fact that I am addicted to sugar…and that’s why my moods would fluctuate so much during the day. I never have this problem on the weekends…because I barely eat sugar at all on the weekends. I realized that when I had my Winter break from school…then too, I didn’t wake up feeling doomsday.
I think my body gets on a sugar high in the morning with the chai, plummets a little later, picks back up at lunch, plummets a bit after school, then I give it one more shot in the evening to end my day. When I wake up in the morning…I’ve gone about 12 hours with out a sugar fix, and my mind is whacked out.
I honestly believe this.
Because, today has been DAY 18 of no sugar AT ALL. And I swear, I feel and see much more clearer. Since dropping my sugar kick, I’m not as stressed at school, I’m not waking up all doomsday, I’ve lost weight even, and I feel happy. I feel like myself ALL the time—not just partially.
I am so amazed and in awe how changing this one thing in my diet can make such a huge impact on my outlook on life and the overall way I feel and navigate through my day. It is absolutely incredible.
Now, the only thing I am craving is more awareness. More awareness to pick out more of my unhealthy patterns and do some tweeking to see what impact other changes might have on my life. I can’t express enough how huge this is for me. How I feel changing my diet–is changing my Creative Juicy Life–is bringing me closer to my truth.
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