I Promise Myself Revisited
Published on April 12, 2010
Photo by the awesome Hansel, of course!
So, I’ve been thinking.
This weekend I posted the poem I Promise Myself here on Dirty Footprints Studio. I try to post it every month…ANNNND....you can find it on my “about” page as well.
I kind of have a thing for this poem. I like it. It speaks to me. Gets me all jazzed and ready to face the world…like how the Eye of the Tiger by Survivor is for some people!
These kids rock!
And usually, when I post it, I get the same nice response. People being inspired–people claiming that they’re gonna run on out and spread it all over the place–print t-shirts, make billboards, tattoo their biceps with it.
Well, sort of that response.
And then, this weekend Miss Emma, the Creative Juicy over at Treehouse Jukebox, decided to challenge the whole poem–and share her twist on it all.
What sparked was a discussion on what does it all really mean? Is it actually realistic to be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear? Shouldn’t we acknowledge–even embrace the darker side of our selves? Is this poem all fluff–and totally disregarding the whole being of who we truly are?
This weekend I let my mind get all wrapped up in analyzing this poem..in over thinking it even. I started to try to get to the core of what it really is that attracts me to this poem–enough to keep repeating it, to live with it, to read it often as if it was a prayer or a pledge of allegiance to myself.
And then, it occurred to me.
Stop thinking about it. Stop trying to dig deeper and excavate reason. What attracted you to this poem–was a feeling. A feeling that it provoked in me–to believe. To believe in the best of who I am…always–whatever circumstance, emotion, or event was to arise.
I think our feelings are a land mine of gold and precious gems.
They hold the answers to so many of our minds silly, silly questions–but we seem to lose the ability to interpret them as we grow older. As our minds develop–we believe that it should hold precedence over the rest of us.
For so long now, my heart–my soul–my deepest feelings have been telling me to make a change and start a career that is based fully on working for myself by fully expressing my Creative Juicy-ness.
I could feel this in my bones.
Stroll through the archives here on DFS and you’ll see for yourself as well. This is something I’ve been living with for quite awhile.
But it’s my mind that’s been conducting business all this time. My mind has been instructing my decisions based on hard cold facts–like my checkbook, the bills that show up each month, and it certainly takes lots of notes when it hears about the “bad economy”.
Though, all I have to say is thank you mind….but no thanks. Where the hell have you gotten me so far? And, the conductor you might be—I’m the stinking train–and my feelings are the coal that really run this babey. So back off–you’re fired.
My heart, my soul, these crazy feelings I have buried deep within–they’re taking over–they’ve been promoted…and now I believe the real journey has begun…and that is what I promise myself.
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