When I Chose To

There is a stillness that exists.
Inside me.

I find it on the mountain top.
When my feet glide steadily into the river.
As the sun soaks into the back of my neck.

A stillness I rarely stay with-
But miss desperately
Every time we part.

She feels like expansion
But is as solid as a rock.

She speaks with messengers and magic
when she’s feeling frisky.

The way she’s knows.
I know.
That there is no reason to explain.
Or nothing to figure out.

But she keeps on asking me what if.
What if I embraced her
Whole heartedly.

What if I poured my love
my passion
into understanding her encrypted language-
Like it was my business
my art
my everything.

What if this was the teacher
I’ve been searching for.
The direction my path
was turning.

What if all of this I’m feeling
is really
truly
ok.

What if spirituality has nothing to do with
money or manifesting.
Or a career.
Or a wise choice
from a foolish one.

What if having less
and failing is
something to be celebrated.

Like right here.  Right now.
Let’s lift the veils
Peel back the layers
Expose the wounds to light.

What if I just choose
to love unconditionally-
This thing I call my Life.