Everyone is Lying–You CAN’T Do Anything You Want


Yesterday Hansel and I were talking about things we did as kids that seem to have matured into things we do now as adults.  And one thing I feel that I’ve always done….like ALWAYS done….is plan what’s next.  Even when I was an itty bitty–I would be in the midst of something and thinking what will I do tomorrow–who will I go play with–what will we do.  Even more than that–I was majorly thinking all the time what life would be like once I was an adult and had independence.  I was babysitting at 12 or 13 and already saving for a car–knowing that was going to be an important element of my independence.

The other thing is I was the organizer–the planner–the mover and the shaker in the sense.  I was the kid on the block that each summer hosted my own “summer camp” in the back yard–planned all the activities including an annual parade down the street with wagons, bikes, and roller skates!

Yeah, you know what else?!?!

My poor Mom….

In third grade I even planned a Saturday Halloween costume party with out my mother knowing about it until that morning when I informed her that we would be needing snacks and drinks for about 15 of my friends.  She was shocked and angry to say the least.  I…I have to say–was brilliant in my guerilla party planning!  For weeks I secretly made decorations and my own costume out of brown paper bags (I think was some kind of “Indian”).  I created invitations–sent them out and everything. I even made my own pinata that had some little toys and knick knacks inside I no longer wanted.  And what do you know–15 kids showed up in costumes just like planned, and my dear mother had hot dogs, chips, and grape kool-aid for everyone.

Afterwards, I was grounded for a week.

The reason why I share this–is because we can’t get away from who we are–and if you are wondering who you are–or more especially what your special gifts are–look back to when you were a child.  What did you like to do best?  What DID you do best?  What came natural and you did it no matter if it was going to get you in trouble or not?  Even those “bad things” you might have done are laced with truth (I was a marvel at cutting high school with out being caught and made the honor roll every year.)

That fact that I was a planner and organizer and hugely independent has carried with me throughout my adult life–it’s just I never really thought about it till recently–and now can see it clearly.

For instance–every job I’ve ever had–I’ve always become or started off as the manager. For a few years I worked in the restaurant business–and each place I worked at I would start off as a server or bartender and in a few weeks there–always ended up as a manager or supervisor.  It would just happen–I never applied for it or anything.

And, I mean c’mon–I went into teaching—it was totally obvious as an itty bitty already when I was creating summer camp for all the other kids in the neighborhood that education was in my blood!

And then–what totally makes me laugh is 21 SECRETS.  Here I am working on my own–complete independence (another thing I’ve been huge on since childhood)–and well, I have to create something of my own to fulfill my natural characteristic to manage and be with other people.  Seriously, it’s in my blood.

It’s kind of funny that you are who you are and there ain’t no getting away from it!

I get a lot of emails from women of all ages that feel lost.  They can’t quite pinpoint their passion–or they feel that their jobs and careers are not fulfilling–and they ask me for advice.

Personally I think the sentiment that you can do anything (you put your mind to) is the problem.

You can’t do anything.  More importantly–you’re not suppose to do just anything.

We’re each born with these special gifts, talents, and ways of doing things naturally that create our own constellation of who we are.

We’re not suppose to go out and put our mind to being anything.  We’re suppose to be aware of what makes our constellation and then shine.

The thing is–even when I worked jobs such as being a server or bartender–that weren’t my ideal job–I shined my constellation of awesome while I did it–and the Universe always opened doors for me to be in a position that would fit who I was naturally.  Than, even though it wasn’t my favorite thing to be doing–I still felt good doing it–and that was half the battle right there.

So, if by chance you are one of those beautiful constellations unsure and unhappy about how you fit in the galaxy of career and life’s purpose.  I say do some journaling about your youth.  Who were you as a child? Who were you–or what was the role that you carried out in your group of friends or in school?  What tasks or things do you really enjoy about your current and past jobs–even if the overall job isn’t your cup of tea?

The key is to shine those talents, skills, and ways of doing things in life….everyone knows that there is no *perfect job*–you are never going to have work that is completely everything you ever dreamed of.  But you can have a job that fulfills who you truly are–that when you’re in the position–if be ideal or not–you are in alignment with your constellation of gifts and talents.

Than you’ll see how the world spins a bit smoother on it’s axis.

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